My Celebrity Life

Dan Howell explains why he ‘quit YouTube’ as he returns for first time in three years and announces world tour

Dan Howell has returned to YouTube for the first time in almost three years, with the star delighting fans by announcing a world tour.

We did not have this on our 2022 bingo card but we’re very here for it.

The 30-year-old, best known for being one half of Dan and Phil, last uploaded on the platform in 2019, sharing a widely-praised coming out video, which racked up 12million views, before disappearing once again.

Beginning the video by reflecting on his journey to become a YouTuber, he went on to speak about how he and Phil shot to fame on the platform, and his mental health struggles.

He spoke about his iconic videos with Phil, saying the pair showed a ‘different side of masculinity’ but he worried about the disparity between his solo videos and the Dan and Phil content.

‘It was a riot but it was intense and all the support and enthusiasm I’ve always appreciated to the side…having a lot of people trying to speculate and expose your sexuality for lols isn’t great,’ he said.

‘I almost didn’t enjoy any of it because I was living in absolute fear of being outed all the time.’

Dan went on to talk about his struggles with YouTube and the alogorithm, adding that he eventually ‘burnt out’.

‘On 3rd March, 2018, I uploaded my very last video as an absolutely not very active YouTuber called Trying To Live My Truth in which I expressed I literally couldn’t write anymore, make any jokes, share any stories from my life until I dealt with some s**t because I realised, as long as I was putting myself out here online in front of an audience to be commented on, I felt I couldn’t change or grow, so I had to go,’ Dan reflected.

‘I had burnt out from being a YouTuber,’ he added, referencing his original YouTube name and joking: ‘Dan was, in every sense, not on fire.’

He went on to reflect on his coming out video, saying that he had reached his limit of what he could create, and he couldn’t imagine making anything else on YouTube ever again.

‘I wanted to change. Something new, something different, something inspiring, something where it’s not just me by myself, talking about myself,’ he said.

‘New people, new challenges, new experiences. And now that I’ve finally come out, I can be real and actually enjoy this crazy f**king life cuz I’m free to just be me.’

Saying he ‘couldn’t go back to the way things were’, he reflected on his later experience with YouTube Originals, who he says cancelled his plans for a comedy show after he invested a huge amount of time into it, before speaking about his awful experience with insomnia and anxiety.

‘I felt like my whole life story on YouTube had ended in ruin,’ he added.

However, Dan eventually made the decision to return, admitting he ‘still loves’ the platform.

‘Let’s be honest, I’m never going to be a “good YouTuber”,’ he said. ‘The day I daily upload is the day you have to assemble the conspiracy creators to analyse how I’ve been replaced with a deepfake. But I would be stupid not to use this platform, which my history was built on.’

Dan added that he’s going to continue to create videos, and that he’ll be going on a world tour this year.

‘If you want to see some stand-up self-deprecation, feel part of something, maybe even have a little crisis and a laugh like it’s the end of the world because, let’s face it, it probably is…’ he added before cutting to a promo picture for the tour.

‘So I’m back. I promise nothing other than I am trying to make myself happy, do stuff that matters and if that brings you any happiness maybe this whole damn thing was worth it.’

Finishing up the video, he declared: ‘So yeah, that is why I quit YouTube. Subscribe!’

Fans are absolutely thrilled to see him back, with one tweeting: ‘Getting a Dan Howell YouTube notification in 2022 wasn’t expected I just dropped my phone.’

‘No matter who you are, if you watched dan howell in the early 2010s, you will return and have a full body reaction when you see that he uploaded. he has a grip on you that you will never be able to escape, it doesn’t matter how many years has gone by. you are at the mercy of dan,’ another added.

One more said: ‘Shout out to all the people who didn’t give up on Dan Howell.’

Dan last uploaded in 2019, with his video Basically I’m Gay.

In the ensuing 45-minute clip, he shared his struggles with identity and thoughts about his sexuality from a ‘scientific’ and a ‘literal’ perspective, and spent countless years agonising over it in secret.

The star went on to reveal that he spent Christmases and family birthdays flirting with the idea of coming out, before being too worried or uncomfortable to go through with it.

In the end, he decided to ‘confront’ himself.

Addressing his fellow YouTubers, he said: ‘F**k the scientific definition, f**k the literal definition and what everyone thinks. I finally have to confront and accept this. I’m gay.’


Credit: Original article published here.

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