Elliot Page has opened up about his transgender journey in his first interview since his reveal and he admits that for a long time he ‘couldn’t look at photos’ of himself.
The Umbrella Academy actor, 34, came out as a transgender man at the beginning of December last year and penned a heartfelt statement on Instagram introducing himself as Elliot and revealing he now goes by the pronouns he/they.
Elliot – previously known as Ellen – said that he feels ‘lucky’ to have ‘arrived at this place in my life’, as he threw his support behind the trans community.
In his first interview since his reveal, Elliot has reflected on his acting career prior to coming out as transgender and admit he ‘never recognised myself’.
Speaking to Time magazine, Elliot explained that it was difficult for him to watch back movies he’d starred in like Hard Candy, Juno and Inception – especially the films in which he played more feminine roles.
‘For a long time I could not even look at a photo of myself,’ Elliot candidly admitted, as he revealed he used to suffer from anxiety, panic attacks and depression.
‘How to explain to people that even though [I was] an actor, just putting on a T-shirt cut for a woman would make me so unwell,’ Elliot said.
In 2014, Elliot came out as gay and later found love with ex-wife Emma Portner, who he filed for divorce from in January.
The pair first went public with their relationship in 2017 and lived together in New York, later tying the knot in January 2018.
Confirming their split, the pair released a joint statement to People that read: ‘After much thought and careful consideration, we have made the difficult decision to divorce following our separation last summer.
‘We have the utmost respect for each other and remain close friends.’
While Elliot says coming out as gay made him feel better within himself, he was aware that there was still a lot of ‘discomfort’.
‘The difference in how I felt before coming out as gay to after was massive, but did the discomfort in my body ever go away? No, no, no, no,’ he said.
Now, Elliot is looking to the future and he revealed he is now ‘excited to act’ knowing that he is ‘fully who I am in this body’.
He added: ‘No matter the challenges and difficult moments of this, nothing amounts to getting to feel how I feel now.’
After Elliot came out as transgender, he was inundated with praise from fans and celebrities alike, with stars like Miley Cyrus and Jennifer Garner reaching out and chat show host Ellen DeGeneres calling Elliot ‘inspirational’.
Touched by the response he received, Elliot thanked those for supporting him for the love they had showed him.
He wrote on Instagram: ‘From the bottom of my heart, thank you. Your love and support has been the greatest gift.
‘Stay safe. Be there for each other. If you are able, support @transanta and @translifeline. See you in 2021.’