Emma Kenny of This Morning claimed she felt’selfish’ for becoming a mother at the age of 50.
The daytime show’s agony aunt announced last month that she had given birth to a baby girl after a decade of trying to conceive.
Emma announced she had named her new baby Etta-Blue after keeping her pregnancy a secret, as she released a flood of photos of her newborn girl and husband Pete Skywalker on social media.
Despite receiving letters of encouragement and congratulations at the time, Emma has now admitted to feeling selfish.
The mum-of-three said: ‘I felt a great deal of selfishness all the way up until giving birth.’
She continued to OK!: ‘There are moments when I think, “I wish I could have another 20 years with Etta.”
‘I could beat myself up about it, but my best friend died at 43, so you don’t always get the time that’s promised to you.
‘I’ll have conversations with Etta about it as she gets older.’
Emma elsewhere opened up about her grief following failed IVF attempts and miscarriages.
She said: ‘For 10 years I tried to have her and failed constantly. I’ll have to process my grief over the fact that I couldn’t have her at 42 or 45
‘I feel I’ve had years stolen from my child, but I’m very grateful for having her.’
However, Emma also considered the benefits of having a child aged 50, saying she’ll be even ‘more flexible’ and ‘chilled’ than she was with her sons, 16 and 14, after ‘following convention’ with them.
‘This time I’m doing things completely differently and I think she’ll benefit massively from that.’
Revealing her newborn earlier this month, Emma wrote: ‘I’ve waited 10 years to finally hold you in my arms. With every miscarriage, I tried to learn to be grateful and accepting of what I had. I tried to dampen my desire to be a mother to another child, to find peace in my natural infertility and yet it felt so unnatural all in the same moment.
View this post on Instagram
‘I have spent the last 9 months hiding my pregnancy, travelling the country with my theatre show, filming my YouTube crime content, and working on as many projects as possible in a bid to distract myself from the growing hope and possibility that this time you may just become a reality, and that this time things will end in the sweetness of joy, instead of the agony of loss.’
The TV star continued: ‘For the past 38 weeks you have grown quietly, you have allowed me a symptomless and easy pregnancy, and whilst your arrival was by far the most dramatic, I feel a blindsiding giddy glee knowing you finally decided to announce your presence in a way that none of us could ignore.’
Emma went on to laud Etta-Blue, stating her ‘beauty was astounding, company faultless, presence completely deep.’
She continued: ‘Whilst I grieve the years I wish we could have had together, I know that you are meant to be mine right now, and not a minute sooner. Etta-Blue, you have healed more than you’ll ever know, and reminded me of the wonder of being, even in the face of loss and suffering.
‘I cannot wait to share your adventures. All my love, all my heart, all my hope…..mummy xxxx (Etta-Blue born 12.50am 30/07/2023).’
Emma signed off her post with the following quote from Mirza Asadullah Khan Ghalib: ‘Love knows no difference between life and death. The one who gives you a reason to live is also the one who takes your breath away.’
This Morning airs weekdays from 10am on ITV.
