Jeremy Clarkson has rented a bull with ‘massive testicles’ to expand his cattle on his Diddly Squat farm.
The 62-year-old presenter, who fronts Amazon docuseries Clarkson’s Farm, rented Break-Heart Maestro in an attempt to boost his livestock and had hoped that ‘with a little bit of luck’ his cows would all be ‘up the duff’ at the same time.
‘I’ve rented a bull. He has testicles the size of space hoppers, and his name is Break-Heart Maestro,’ he revealed.
‘With a bit of luck, he’d get them all up the duff at roughly the same time, which would make calving easier.
‘My cows came round the corner and their walk turned into a sashay!’ he told The Daily Star newspaper.
Initially, he had procured Break-Heart’s services exclusively for his white heifer Pepper but decided that the bull ‘may as well use those hairy space hoppers to fill up all the other lady cows as well’.
News of the rented bull comes just days after the former Top Gear star announced that his Diddly Squat Farm pig had died in the heatwave that swept through England and Europe.
He wrote on Twitter: ‘Thankfully, the global warming is now over but tragically, its brief visit took the life of my big pig. RIP pig.’
Twitter users had previously flocked to his Twitter with angry responses, accusing Jeremy of downplaying the seriousness of the heatwave after he told people worried by the soaring temperatures to ‘go and sit under a tree’.
One user wrote: ‘Perhaps you will realise how serious this is then. How would you like it if your land was on fire and you were struggling to harvest enough food to keep your animals fed or winter, let alone anything else? I feel sorry for the proper farmers.’
The TV star, 62, is currently sunning himself in France with his girlfriend Lisa Hogan, 50, on a glamorous getaway featuring a luxury yacht.
Clarkson’s Farm is available to stream on Amazon Prime Video.