
Shirley Ballas has acknowledged that even 20 years after the loss of her beloved brother David, she is still ‘terrified’ by the prospect of additional lives being lost to suicide.
The Strictly Come Dancing judge, 62, lost her sibling in 2003, when he committed suicide at the age of 44.
Shirley has stated that she would continue to do anything she can to help other families as the anniversary of her brother’s death approaches.
‘Nothing terrifies me more than somebody losing a loved one like my family, my mum and I, and going through the pain of when he died 20 years ago’ she told Metro.co.uk.
‘You never get over it. You learn to live with it, but you never get over it,’ she added.
Shirley remarked that in the two decades following David’s death, dialogues about mental health have evolved, but that there was still a long way to go.
‘Definitely [it’s improved] from 20 years ago, but it’s not as far as it should be,’ she said.
‘I think it’s getting there, but it’s still something that should involve weekly chats.’
Shirley said that she would want to see some kind of regular programming that encouraged people to check in on, and talk to others about, mental health, citing the abundance of shows available to us at the push of a button to entertain, enlighten, and educate us.
‘Even if we had something on TV that was five or 10 minutes that was checking in on people’s mental health, we may also be able to [keep on] saying things [about our mental wellbeing],’ she considered.
Shirley reflected on the ongoing stigma around depression, recalling how difficult it was to get her brother assistance in the weeks leading up to his death.

‘He was depressed for a good six weeks, and my mum went to take care of him because he was in a really dark place,’ she shared.
‘She decided to take him to a hospital but as they were pulling up at the door there was someone that he knew there, and he decided not to go in.’
‘He was ashamed and didn’t want to appear weak, so he went home and of course, I had brought my mum to London one day, and he took his own life then.’
Shirley had permitted her son Mark to go out with friends that night, but was awoken the next day by police officers knocking on her door.
‘I’ll never forget it…I opened the door and they asked for Mrs Rich and I moved aside and my mum moved forward and it was her son [they were there about],’ she explained.
‘The pain that she goes through and that I do, and that his daughter does as well, it’s been an awful loss, and I want to help anybody who is suffering or has lost a loved one.’
Shirley has served as an ambassador for the Campaign Against Living Miserably (Calm), which promotes awareness and provides assistance to those dealing with mental illness.
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Suicide claims 125 lives in the United Kingdom per week, with men accounting for 75% of those lost.
Shirley is now preparing to take to the skies next month in a series of risky stunts to earn money for the group.
Shirley will face her fear of heights front on in Skyathlon, which will see her do the world’s fastest zip line, a wing walk and a jump in only one week.
‘I thought I needed to go big and do something people would think I’d never do,’ she explained.
While Shirley’s mother, Audrey, isn’t delighted with the prospect of her daughter performing such risky deeds, she feels her brother would have been completely on board.
‘My mother won’t speak to me and says I am absolutely bonkers, but my brother would have been saying something like “let’s go and do this sis”,’ she laughed.
‘He was just that kind of guy.
‘I feel like he is there with me at times, urging me to do things out of my comfort zone, so I’m sure he will be there with me as I jump out of an airplane.’
Need support? Worried about someone? Calm’s helpline and webchat are open daily 5pm-midnight.
To donate to Shirley’s Skyathlon, go to https://www.thecalmzone.net/skyathlon
Strictly Come Dancing is streaming on BBC iPlayer.
How can Calm help?
CALM’s helpline and livechat are open from 5pm to midnight every day, 365 days a year.
If you or someone you know needs help, call 0800 58 58 58.